Random Jokers

I normally meet this type of people all the time. Here are some of the stories.

One day I was going to the nearby shop to get a balance they owe to my mother. This was at about 8.45 p.m. It was dark then I saw a guy coming in a push bike with something like a cigarette in one hand. I was looking at him but was thinking about something else. While passing, he asks me “Aiya meka Joint ekak. Awulak naa neda ??” (Yo, I’m smoking a Joint, Okay no??) I didn’t answer him. He went passed me and several times he was shouting “is it ok ? is it ok ?” mad bugger, wot the hek do I care…

Then another day I cross the road and in the dark I see an old man. He looks a bit familiar too. But he seems mighty outa balance cocked. He comes to me and says. “mallee mang beelaa, kaatawath kiyanna epaa” (bro, I drank today. Please don’t tell anyone) I told him I have urgent business and went on my way. Crazy Old Fool !!

And then, the best one. I got into a bus in the morning and got a seat. An old man (again, Dammit !!) was sitting next to me. He asks me whether I am in the Army. (Whoa, what makes him think like that) I started laughing (others in the bus also laughing by now as I was dressed up to go to work and it was very clear I was in office attire) and asked him what made him ask me so. He said because I was carrying a big bag. (I normally swing across my shoulder a quite big bag. But its 75% empty. Heh heh) He went on telling me that there’s no Independence right now but there was Independence before we got Independence, D.S Senanayake was good another one was bad and blah blah.. cough.. cough...

Then he went on to ask me where I live. I normally give wrong answers to avoid unnecessary trouble. So I thought I’d say a name of a road (road J which is close by to the actual road where I live), but then I thought I’d say the truth. Then he says he lives in road J. Phew !! Then he asks me about my family and everything. I just gave vague answers and didn’t go in detail. He said he should know my family and asked whether I know Mr. N (who is a very close relative of mine) I said, err yeah I think must be quite a distant relative. (simply because I wanted this man to shut up and leave me alone) Then he asked me who my Grand Father was. When I replied he says “Ahh I knew him very well…. wait…. what child, Mr. N is a very close relative of yours no” I was stumped for a duck at that moment.

Then for about 45 minutes he was talking to me about various things from saving my salary to how girls should not perm or straighten their hair. FOOOF !! I’ve had enough. He did ask me whether he was annoying me. Bloody Hell Yeah…. He was damn loud, and the whole bus could hear. And OH…. I noticed there was an old Lady seated right in front of him. I was wondering whether he was trying to impress her by blabbering about his achievements (Naaki Kukula) Yet didn’t shut up after she got down also. So he doesn’t fit the description.

This old man in the bus happens to be distantly related too. (Later I found out) awww shit…. Somehow, I was very tensed, with a lot of responsible work on my shoulders (and also doing the rounds in my head) for the day. He sorta helped me to take my mind off the work at least for a while. Other thing is this Sirasa TV is making fun of people and recording secretly (they reveal later) for a TV show. So its dangerous, have to be careful and shouldn’t get get caught for it. Heh heh !!

I still wondered what made him actually think I was in the Army (apart from my bag, I was having a very short hair cut and must’v looked like the skinny Army Private on his way home)